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“Falsely ingenuous flautist”, “Hemingway of the foam trenches”: Gaspard Proust has fun with Hugo Clément

  • Post category:Entertainment
  • Reading time:3 mins read

“Falsely ingenuous flautist”, “Miskine king of snowflakes”, “Hemingway of the trenches in foam”… Gaspard Proust did not go easy on Hugo Clément and his report on wine production in France at the global warming time. “On the Frontlines – Red Alert on Wine” or rather “in the windshield” as the chronicle of the humorist begins, which clearly situates the tone with which he will dismantle the work of Hugo Clément.

Gaspard Proust notes several errors in the report broadcast on France 5. “The voice-over begins with ‘We are in Côte-Rôtie’ while filming pickers picking whites at the Vernay estate. If he had obtained his press card elsewhere than from a Troca street vendor, he would know that we were in Condrieu”, before mentioning another inconsistency, “Falsely ingenuous flautist of the eco-citizen din, Hugo will first be indignant about the legal tolerance margins granted to alcohol levels on wine bottles. Peremptorily, he decrees that consumers want wine with little alcohol. Really? The sale of spirits has never been so good. Would he have woken up asshole with dried vomit in a shopping cart on the banks of the Saint-Martin canal?”

The comedian then tackles another sequence which shows the polluting practices of winegrowers in order to save their crops. “This spring, frost threatens. Our Miskine, king of snowflakes, discovers that the winegrowers are burning candles to save the harvest. When the wise man points to the moon, Hugo sucks his finger. (…) That the winegrower could lose a year of work, that won’t make him move one. Our Hemingway of the foam trenches knows where he’s talking about. One day a power outage unplugged his freezer and he had to throw out his Mr. Freezes. He didn’t die.”

To conclude his column, Gaspard Proust reveals one last detail which is even more surprising about Hugo Clément. “We thought that the moving moment of the documentary would consist of making our D-Days porpoise in a bolster taste an old vintage. Missed, because Hugo does not drink wine… Yes, you read that right. No, Hugo will want to lubricate our eye while whining about the disappearance of a family of bears because of the fires in Napa Valley… The day when he will do a program on the foie gras industry, he will no doubt try to make us cry about a whale stranded in The Baule.”

The journalist’s reaction

Hugo Clément also reacted on his Twitter account. The committed journalist received a lot of messages after the publication of Gaspard Proust’s column. Being attached to the right to satire, the journalist does not seem to have taken it badly. “Being very attached to the right to satire, I have no problem being the target. If you don’t want to be mocked by comedians, you shouldn’t expose yourself publicly. That’s the game!” , he writes with the “upside down smile” emoji which seems to be ironic.